MAN-THING (2005)
Just the other day, I sat down to watch the 2005 straight-to-DVD movie MAN-THING. I feel that first of all I should provide some justification for doing this, despite the fact that you're probably not surprised by this at all if you regularly read this blog and see the kinds of drivel I watch.
It's based on a Marvel Comics character created back in the 70s and was one of a glut of muck monsters that emerged back then (the most famous being DC's rival character Swamp Thing). I have a fondness for such characters and although I prefer Swampy to Marvel's creature I still couldn't resist the urge to see the latter turned into a movie, albeit a cheap one. DC already saw Swamp Thing turned into two movies, a cartoon and a TV series and although the TV series wasn't something I care for (the theme tune was the Troggs' "Wild Thing", re-worked with new lyrics!) I really enjoyed the films (despite them being both cheap and rubbish) and I absolutely adored the TV series (despite it being even cheaper and even more rubbish).
So on to Marvel's attempt. Obviously deciding that there was no cinematic movie franchise in Man-Thing, Marvel turned it into a straight-to-DVD venture, not the only character to get the treatment. That said, it's not really much worse than a lot of crap that gets released in cinemas; the only real difference is that the cast is made up entirely of people you've never heard of.
It gets off to a good enough start. Within the first ten minutes, we get a bloody murder, a bunch of rednecks, an attractive young lady doing what attractive young ladies do best in low-budget horror films, a really pompous and portentous voice-over about mankind ruining the planet, and the new sheriff in town turning up to have his assistant reveal that the previous sheriff "kind of went insane before he disappeared". What a set-up.
After that, the film descends into pretty standard by-the-numbers horror nonsense, but the great dialogue doesn't stop. Where would we be without the wise old Native American character to spout forth about the old customs and issue lines like "maybe he is in the swamp... maybe the swamp is in him" - no cliche box is left unticked.
It's not just the wise old Indian, there's also the evil corporation out to exploit the swamp regardless of environmental or social issues. Hurrah. Here's where the nice subtle lighting scheme come in too - not only do we get a spooky green for all the swamp scenes, but the industrial complex is obviously always shot in strong sunlight, the land bleached orange and bereft of light. The dastardly nature of it all is even emphasised by having wrecked old cars sitting on fire outside the place, for no other reason than cars on fire make a place look really nasty. Never mind the fact that there doesn't appear to be any logical reason why someone would leave lots of cars on fire like that.
Other cliches abound, such as the romance that develops (or more accurately, just seems to happen), which can be spotted from the moment the two characters meet. Wow! A hippy protester argues with the new sheriff before kicking him to the ground into a muddy puddle! Gosh, I bet we won't see them getting together by the end of the film.
If the deep and meaningful philosophy (yes, sarcasm) that the Indian treats us to is bad, I should at least applaud the z-list cast for being able to carry off scenes in which they discover that a man killed by a tree had the branches grow through him... from the inside out! Gasp!
I know I wouldn't have been able to deliver that with a straight face so well done to them.
Let's see, is there anything else I can give the film credit for...? Well, I guess the now standard "destroy everything with lots of fire" ending has a nice twist; the monster is actually reasonably well realised with the aid of some CGI, although I do feel that DC Comics were more faithfully treated in their Swamp Thing adaptations when they had Dick Durrock running about in a rubber suit.
There's also a nod for the comic geeks watching the film - I was about to say "comic geeks, like me", but I've just realised... who else is actually going to be watching a straight-to-DVD MAN-THING movie except comic geeks? Anyway, the reference is there, but it's not exactly subtle (like the rest of the film is...) and consists of naming two characters Steve Gerber and Mike Ploog, after the comics writer and artist respectively.
More subtle is the moment when a victim is found with his face contorted and stretched in almost exactly the same way as the infamous melted body in John Carpenter's THE THING. And who was involved in the production of THE THING? That's right, Mike Ploog. However, I suspect that I'm reading too much into that one and it's more of a coincidence. I'll give them the benefit of the doubt though.
The verdict - MAN-THING is cheap, rubbish, cliched and a whole more bad things besides. However, this is my opinion we're talking about here and I'd be lying if I said I didn't enjoy it. If you actually have standards approaching respectability you might want to stay clear.
It's based on a Marvel Comics character created back in the 70s and was one of a glut of muck monsters that emerged back then (the most famous being DC's rival character Swamp Thing). I have a fondness for such characters and although I prefer Swampy to Marvel's creature I still couldn't resist the urge to see the latter turned into a movie, albeit a cheap one. DC already saw Swamp Thing turned into two movies, a cartoon and a TV series and although the TV series wasn't something I care for (the theme tune was the Troggs' "Wild Thing", re-worked with new lyrics!) I really enjoyed the films (despite them being both cheap and rubbish) and I absolutely adored the TV series (despite it being even cheaper and even more rubbish).
So on to Marvel's attempt. Obviously deciding that there was no cinematic movie franchise in Man-Thing, Marvel turned it into a straight-to-DVD venture, not the only character to get the treatment. That said, it's not really much worse than a lot of crap that gets released in cinemas; the only real difference is that the cast is made up entirely of people you've never heard of.
It gets off to a good enough start. Within the first ten minutes, we get a bloody murder, a bunch of rednecks, an attractive young lady doing what attractive young ladies do best in low-budget horror films, a really pompous and portentous voice-over about mankind ruining the planet, and the new sheriff in town turning up to have his assistant reveal that the previous sheriff "kind of went insane before he disappeared". What a set-up.
After that, the film descends into pretty standard by-the-numbers horror nonsense, but the great dialogue doesn't stop. Where would we be without the wise old Native American character to spout forth about the old customs and issue lines like "maybe he is in the swamp... maybe the swamp is in him" - no cliche box is left unticked.
It's not just the wise old Indian, there's also the evil corporation out to exploit the swamp regardless of environmental or social issues. Hurrah. Here's where the nice subtle lighting scheme come in too - not only do we get a spooky green for all the swamp scenes, but the industrial complex is obviously always shot in strong sunlight, the land bleached orange and bereft of light. The dastardly nature of it all is even emphasised by having wrecked old cars sitting on fire outside the place, for no other reason than cars on fire make a place look really nasty. Never mind the fact that there doesn't appear to be any logical reason why someone would leave lots of cars on fire like that.
Other cliches abound, such as the romance that develops (or more accurately, just seems to happen), which can be spotted from the moment the two characters meet. Wow! A hippy protester argues with the new sheriff before kicking him to the ground into a muddy puddle! Gosh, I bet we won't see them getting together by the end of the film.
If the deep and meaningful philosophy (yes, sarcasm) that the Indian treats us to is bad, I should at least applaud the z-list cast for being able to carry off scenes in which they discover that a man killed by a tree had the branches grow through him... from the inside out! Gasp!
I know I wouldn't have been able to deliver that with a straight face so well done to them.
Let's see, is there anything else I can give the film credit for...? Well, I guess the now standard "destroy everything with lots of fire" ending has a nice twist; the monster is actually reasonably well realised with the aid of some CGI, although I do feel that DC Comics were more faithfully treated in their Swamp Thing adaptations when they had Dick Durrock running about in a rubber suit.
There's also a nod for the comic geeks watching the film - I was about to say "comic geeks, like me", but I've just realised... who else is actually going to be watching a straight-to-DVD MAN-THING movie except comic geeks? Anyway, the reference is there, but it's not exactly subtle (like the rest of the film is...) and consists of naming two characters Steve Gerber and Mike Ploog, after the comics writer and artist respectively.
More subtle is the moment when a victim is found with his face contorted and stretched in almost exactly the same way as the infamous melted body in John Carpenter's THE THING. And who was involved in the production of THE THING? That's right, Mike Ploog. However, I suspect that I'm reading too much into that one and it's more of a coincidence. I'll give them the benefit of the doubt though.
The verdict - MAN-THING is cheap, rubbish, cliched and a whole more bad things besides. However, this is my opinion we're talking about here and I'd be lying if I said I didn't enjoy it. If you actually have standards approaching respectability you might want to stay clear.
posted by Alan at 7:42 pm
0 Comments:
Post a Comment
<< Home